Seeing what tricks my new pet knows during my first session

outofcontextdnd:

Me: Roll over.

GM: The hedgehog rolls over. It’s adorable.

Me: Stay.

GM: You take a few steps away. The hedgehog remains where it is.

Me: Heel.

GM: The hedgehog heals you for 5 HP.

Me: Holy shit.

faewild:

smashedindigo:

no one saw me wear it therefore it is not dirty

Schrödinger’s laundry

(Source: 2460-pun)

lordxeras:

Everybody should read Artemis Fowl. I don’t think any other book has a six foot tall Irish manservant attacking a fifteen foot troll while armed with only a mace, a suit of medieval armor and a nine-millimeter sig-sauer semiautomatic.